


Love and Logic

by Sarek and Amanda Archive Maintainer (Selek)



Category: Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: F/M, Yen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-23
Updated: 2013-03-23
Packaged: 2017-12-06 06:48:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/732646
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Selek/pseuds/Sarek%20and%20Amanda%20Archive%20Maintainer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sarek has a confession to make to Amanda.</p><p>Written by Yen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Love and Logic

**Author's Note:**

> Author's note: A special thank you again to Saidicam. ^^ She kind of inspired this...

Title: Love and Logic  
Author: Yen  
Beta: Saidicam (thank you!)  
Codes: Sa & Am (for Sarek & Amanda)  
Rating: PG  
Disclaimer: Not making a single cent out of this.

 

 

Amanda woke up with a headache. Frowning, she opened her eyes to see a dimly lit ceiling. After staring at it blankly for several long seconds, she closed her eyes momentarily before levering herself into a sitting position very slowly, because her aching head struck a protest with every change in elevation.

 

A blanket fell down to her waist as she sat up. Absent-mindedly, Amanda fingered it as she looked about her dimly lit surroundings and almost fell off the couch when she spotted Sarek working at his desk.

 

If she had made a sound, it was undetectable to human ears but discernable to Vulcan ones. Sarek looked away from his monitor. He stood up and walked around his desk to Amanda, who was trying and failing to remember how in the world she had ended up sleeping on the couch in Sarek's office.

 

Did we…? Amanda felt herself go warm at the incomplete thought. She avoided directly looking at Sarek as he conscientiously inquired as to the state of her condition.

 

A sudden stabbing pain in the back of her skull made her wince and say, "I have a splitting headache," to Sarek, whose mien turned thoughtful. Preoccupied with her headache, Amanda didn't notice as he went around the couch to stand behind her.

 

He asked for permission to touch her and had to ask it thrice for Amanda didn't hear him the first time. The second time, she had heard him but temporarily lost her voice.

 

She flinched involuntarily when he placed his hands on her shoulders. A barely repressed sigh escaped from her when he began to slowly knead the muscles in her shoulders, neck and upper back. "W-what are you doing?"

 

"Neuro-pressure should ease your ailment," he answered, causing Amanda to think, 'Ailment? What ailment?' Her headache had slipped her mind, and she was only currently aware of the tension Sarek was causing with his ministrations.

 

Sarek became similarly aware of it. Disappointment bothered Amanda when he abruptly withdrew his hands.

 

"Don't stop," she murmured, glancing back at him. Amanda felt puzzlement and worry a-coming when she discovered Sarek regarding her rather carefully.

 

"What's wrong, Sarek?"

 

He hesitated in answering, and Amanda couldn't hold back a giggle when he said, "It is evident that I cause an effect on you."

 

"Sarek... I find it very hard to believe you just realized that now."

 

"I apologize for being unspecific. I will rephrase. It is evident that I bring about a detrimental effect on your equilibrium."

 

Amanda's face turned blank. "What do you exactly mean by that, Sarek?"

 

Again, there was hesitation on his part. A chill suddenly came over Amanda. Slowly, she drew the blanket off her, swung her legs over the side of the couch and carefully stood up.

 

Sarek moved to assist her, but Amanda refused to take his proffered hand. She looked at him warily. "Did... Did I do something to you, Sarek?"

 

For the third time, Sarek hesitated. Taking that as a bad sign, Amanda prudently sat down and braced herself for the worst possible thing she could have done to the Vulcan ambassador while under the influence of her hormones, lack of sleep and two cocktails.

 

"Did I molest you?"

 

Sheer relief flooded through Amanda when Sarek's eyes widened with surprise. "No," he said, sounding quite adamant for a Vulcan.

 

"Thank goodness." Amanda finally allowed herself to relax. She leaned back against the couch, closed her eyes and started breathing deeply. At the same time, she began dredging through her memories of the briefing with Sarek. She could recall most of their conservation concerning the upcoming negotiations with the Andorians, but her recollections became very hazy after she had stood up to leave.

 

When she opened her eyes, Sarek was seated beside her and watching her. Amanda deliberately returned his gaze. She knew she shouldn't trust her memory, but she felt strongly that she had kissed him that afternoon. "Did I kiss you, Sarek?"

 

Sarek blinked and said, "Yes." His brows lifted when Amanda asked if he wouldn't mind describing how she had kissed him.

 

His subsequent frown at his, "You do not remember?" flustered Amanda.

 

"Sarek, I was... a little intoxicated—I know that isn't a proper excuse. My difficulty with remembering what had happened between us has more to do with..." Amanda sighed and mumbled the rest of her explanation.

 

The left corner of Sarek's mouth twitched when she very reluctantly confessed that she had the tendency to experience hallucinations involving him.

 

"Events witnessed in a less than sober state is difficult for humans to differentiate as real from imagined events," she solemnly informed Sarek, whose countenance didn't quite match her serious expression.

 

Amanda was all too aware of his amusement. She was tempted to remind him that being amused wasn't properly Vulcan—at the very least, that was what she thought. However, Amanda decided to keep silent. It was infinitely better to have Sarek amused (rather than disturbed) by her very much less than stellar disposition. She wouldn't know what to do if he found her disturbing and neither would she attempt to change such an impression on his part. It was best that Sarek was aware she had her faults and, like all humans, made mistakes.

 

Still, she felt irked when Sarek continued to regard her with amusement. She wondered how he, a Vulcan, could project amusement without actually smiling. Keeping a straight face seemed to come naturally to Sarek. Amanda couldn't remember observing other Vulcans who exhibited a similar trait or perhaps it was because she didn't pay the same level of absorbed (not to be completely relied upon) attention to other Vulcans as she did to Sarek.

 

"Could you at least tell me what else I did to you besides kissing you?" She rather regretted asking when Sarek blandly informed her that she had instructed him to sit down.

 

Her eyes wide, Amanda considered Sarek sitting beside her on the couch and then at the two armchairs nearby.

 

She looked back to him. "Did you sit down?" she asked.

 

Sarek immediately replied, "Yes, you were quite insistent."

 

Amanda slowly nodded, her mind churning away. Sarek sitting... that narrowed it down somewhat; only somewhat, for most of the time she spent with Sarek took place at her classroom in the embassy when she tutored him in Andorian courtesies. Naturally, a considerable number of her fantasies about him involved a hard classroom bench.

 

"Did I sit on your lap?" Amanda grew pensive when Sarek turned thoughtful.

 

"You sat astride my lap," he informed her serenely, his demeanor in stark contrast to Amanda whose ears had turned beet red.

 

His left brow lifted when Amanda, in a helpless tone, said, "I didn't."

 

"I assure you, you did sit astride my lap."

 

"I'm not denying your account, Sarek. I was just expressing disbelief at myself for my…" She sighed. "I see why you were concerned about touching me. I do have considerable trouble controlling myself where you are concerned."

 

"Indeed," Sarek commented, earning himself a tired glare from Amanda who then became very embarrassed when she realized she must had passed out before they had actually done anything. Physically, she didn't feel as though they had done it.

 

"Sorry."

 

Sarek lifted a brow at her apology and Amanda, feeling compelled to explain for her apology, lifted his other brow when she completely apologized for falling asleep.

 

Feeling wretched, Amanda slowly, and with great difficulty, explained that amongst Terrans it was generally considered insulting to fall asleep during—

 

"You did not fall asleep, Amanda," he said, suddenly sounding discomforted; however, Amanda, in her very dejected mood, didn't notice.

 

"Fainting and falling asleep, in this particular matter, are synonymous, Sarek," she informed him quite miserably. She was startled out of her sorry state when Sarek claimed responsibility for her unconscious state. "I beg your pardon? But how could you be responsible for making me faint?"

 

For the first time, Sarek seemed disconcerted to Amanda, who found his reaction as curious as how he was responsible for causing her to pass out. With an expectant expression, she waited for him to explain. He took so long in answering that Amanda wondered if she should prompt him.

 

When he finally gave his explanation, he said it rather slowly for a Vulcan. "I performed to'tsu'k'hy on you, Amanda."

 

She took a second to interpret the Vulcan term. Then, her eyes went round as an owl's. She choked on her immediate reaction, which was to exclaim, "You did the Vulcan nerve pinch on me?!"

 

Sarek frowned at the Terran diminutive for the to'tsu'k'hy. He was about to request that Amanda use the Vulcan term when she suddenly looked away from him. He turned concerned when she shut her eyes tight and took in a choked intake of air. "Amanda—"

 

"Sarek, please give me a few seconds. I have to…" She couldn't complete the sentence as sheer embarrassment bore down on her. Unable to bear being in close proximity to Sarek, she stumbled to her feet and rushed to the balcony doors, which she was utterly relieved to find unlocked. She pulled them open and rushed outside unto the veranda.

 

Barely aware of the chilly night air stinging her flushed cheeks, she leaned against the stone balustrade that rounded the balcony and stared at without really seeing the crescent moon hanging on the horizon. When she could no longer hold back her humiliation, she lowered her head and covered her face as confusion, disappointment and shame swept over her.

 

~o~ ~o~ ~o~

 

"I do not like this," grumbled Guardian Albert.

 

Guardian Yusef tut-tutted. "Now, now. We've all done our turns. It's now your turn."

 

"Whose idea was it again to hold an 'Extremely Embarrassing Experiences Session'?"

 

"Madame Bertrand's. Now, stop complaining. If you don't share embarrassing experiences, they may become deep dark secrets, which generally isn't a good idea. It is wiser to see embarrassing experiences from a humorous outlook."

 

"I can't believe she came up with this. This seems more like your style, Yusef."

 

"Madame Bertrand and I share similar outlooks on many issues. Now, stop procrastinating and be fair. We did your 'Compose Your Own Tune Session' last week. It's time for you to confess a very embarrassing experience."

 

"Very well. Once on Delta IV, I fell head over heels in love with a Deltan."

 

"Albert, that happened to all of us on Delta IV. It's not exactly embarrassing if it happened to all of us."

 

"There is practically no embarrassing experience unique to only one individual, Yusef."

 

"I know that, Albert. But you still have to tell us a very embarrassing experience that most of us haven't gone through. Falling in love with a Deltan doesn't count."

 

"How about falling in love period?"

 

"Albert—"

 

"Look. Is it not the purpose for this session to show our students how to cope with embarrassing experiences, extreme or not? Hmm? What's next? Occasions wherein we lost our tempers, blew our tops and said very stupid things? Are those not also embarrassing? Especially so if we were wrong to be angry in the first place.

 

"Aside from getting it off our chests by confessing and looking at it from a positive stance, embarrassing experiences can also be dealt with by forgetting, ignoring and remembering that embarrassment is a fact of life influenced and propagated by so-called rules of social conduct which run counter to many of our natural instincts.

 

"If on occasion we happen to be in an extremely embarrassing situation—and we will—we should deal with it and get over it post-haste. We should not dwell on it long like nitwits, and we should most certainly not allow it to scar us for the rest of our lives."

 

~o~ ~o~ ~o~

 

"You can deal with this," Amanda murmured to herself. Slowly, she became aware of the cool breeze blowing against her face through her fingers and the reassuring support of the balustrade against which she was resting.

 

She lowered her hands and looked out over the embassy grounds bathed in moonlight with the occasional tree or patch of ground further illuminated by ground lights. She tilted her head back to look up at the sky and absent-mindedly began counting what stars she could see not hidden by clouds or eclipsed by the moon.

 

Blessedly, she wasn't thinking or feeling anything.

 

"Amanda."

 

She turned, not surprised to find Sarek standing a few steps behind her though for a short while she mused over how her sense of tranquility had not cracked at the sound of his velvet voice nor was it broken by the sight of his austere features bathed in moonlight.

 

Somehow, her libido had finally been caged. She knew she could no longer be affected by his mere presence, nor afford to be. Her pride would not allow it.

 

An expression akin to relief shadowed Sarek's features when she smiled at him. "Are you well, Amanda?"

 

"Yes, I am, Sarek. I just needed time to find a proper perspective. Thank you for your concern."

 

Sarek inclined his head slightly in response but continued on regarding her carefully.

 

Amanda pondered at his wary state and let out a sigh tinged with embarrassment. "Rest assured I will not molest you again, Sarek," she told him lightly with a touch of regret in her tone.

 

His eyes widened again. "You did not molest me, Amanda."

 

"You do not have to be polite, Sarek. I can deal with it."

 

"Deal with it?"

 

"I can accept that you do not want me without prejudice," she said simply and steadily, causing his eyebrows to flick skyward.

 

"Amanda, you have misunderstood my basis for performing the to'tsu'k'hy on you."

 

Slowly, she frowned at him. "What other possible reason would you have for nerve pinching me other than you did not wish me to continue... being intimate with you?" She couldn't quite keep a note of irritation out of her voice. Her face turned astonished when Sarek provided his reason for having to render her unconscious.

 

"We are unmarried," he informed her solemnly, sounding acutely logical and very Vulcan to Amanda's numb ears.

 

She opened her mouth to say something, forgot what it was she wanted to say and closed her mouth without saying anything at all, all in five seconds. Ten seconds later, she tried again. "Us marry?"

 

"Yes," he answered, causing Amanda gaze heavenward and silently pray for divine intervention.

 

"Sarek, you nerve pinched me. In the first place, I have not agreed to marry you. In the second place, even had I agreed to marry you, what makes you think that I would still want to marry you after you nerve pinched me while I was being intimate with you?"

 

"You were unaware of your actions, Amanda," he said patiently, none too subtly reminding Amanda that she didn't even clearly remember kissing him.

 

His genteel answer caused Amanda to splutter, "T-that doesn't make any difference!" Sarek raised an eyebrow. He opened his mouth but didn't get to say a word for Amanda held out a warning finger at him and told him, "Don't say it. Don't say anything. Keep quiet." She only lowered her hand after Sarek closed his mouth and nodded at her orders.

 

Amanda shook her head and threw up her hands in exasperation. She couldn't believe it. Here she was, again losing a verbal skirmish with Sarek; this time, over whether or not she should be upset at having been nerve pinched while being intimate with him. "I've right to be upset with you right now," she told him in a mutinous tone. Sarek opened his mouth; she glared at him, daring him to say a word.

 

He dared. "I comprehend—"

 

"No, you do not understand, Sarek. This is very mortifying for me." He nodded and again tried to get another word in, but Amanda now knew better than to let him speak. "I'm warning you. Don't you dare say anything."

 

"Amanda, you are being illogical."

 

"Sarek, in case you've forgotten, I'm human."

 

"I have not forgotten. Vulcans rarely forget." He was taken aback when Amanda walked right up to him and poked his chest with a finger.

 

"Well, you better hope this is one of those rare occasions wherein your memory fails you, Mr. Ambassador, because you can just forget about marrying me. There is no way I'm marrying anyone who nerve pinched me while I was kissing him."

 

"You were not kissing me when I performed to'tsu'k'hy on you."

 

"It does not matter what I was doing to you exactly. The main point is you nerve pinched me while I was doing whatever it was I was doing to you when you nerve pinched me."

 

"You were not listening to reason, similar as you are doing now. You attempted to remove my upper garment. You had difficulty with the catches. I sensed your intention to tear…"

 

"Sarek, shut up."

 

"…my tunic. In order to prevent you from damaging my clothing, I took hold of your wrists. My doing so delighted you and seemed to have compelled you to begin biting my left ear and placing your tongue…"

 

"Sarek, shut up!"

 

"…in its orifice. You asked me to remove your blouse, which I took to mean your upper garment…"

 

"Sarek, I swear…"

 

"…for the purpose…"

 

"…if you don't shut up…"

 

"…of which so that you…"

 

"…I'll kick you somewhere…

 

"…may feel my hands on your…"

 

"…where it will REALLY hurt!"

 

"…mammaries," ended Sarek without missing a beat. He then took several moments to consider Amanda's threat before requesting for additional information on where she would aim her foot.

 

"That's it. I'm leaving."

 

"One of the guest rooms has been prepared for you."

 

"I am not staying in the embassy. I am going home."

 

"I will accompany you."

 

"No, you will not."

 

"I will accompany you. It is 14.2 minutes passed eleven o'clock post meridiem. I do not wish for you to travel alone at this late hour."

 

"Sarek, you are not coming with me."

 

"I am accompanying you, Amanda."

 

Her hand frozen on the door handle, Amanda looked helplessly at the Vulcan on her heels. She didn't want to go back to the dormitory with Sarek tagging along. Her guardians would find out, and her year-mates would never let her hear the end of it. Suddenly, she closed her eyes and, with a moan of dread, knocked her head once against the door panel.

 

Concerned and thinking that her head ailment had reoccurred, he moved closer and lifted a brow when Amanda mumbled, "My friends are going to think we've slept together."

 

Understanding the euphemism and her concern, Sarek tried to put her at ease by informing her that he would set right her companions' misunderstanding of the reason why she had remained in the embassy, but Amanda panicked at the thought of Sarek talking to her friends about what had actually transpired in his office.

 

"Sarek, promise me you'll never ever tell anyone what happened between us today! If anyone asks—your associates, my friends, our families, anyone—please don't say anything!"

 

He blinked. Of course, he would not inform others of what was essentially a private matter between himself and Amanda. He assured that he would keep their shared experience in the strictest confidence, but Amanda felt little comfort. She would never live it down if anyone found out that the Vulcan ambassador had nerve pinched her while she had been so mindlessly involved with him.

 

She felt even worse when Sarek informed her that Eleanor had called her communicator 7.23 hours ago. Though it had been set in silent mode, Sarek had heard it tremble in her bag. "When I had informed Ms. Rafa that you were asleep, she appeared very pleased. She expressed gratitude and requested that I let you rest for as long as possible since you have not been sleeping properly as of late." Sarek's tone was a touch reproving. Amanda made a face at his back as he opened the door to the guest room.

 

The room wasn't as sparsely furnished as she had expected a guest room at the Vulcan embassy to be. Aside from the bed with two end tables, there was a shiny wooden chest of drawers, a dressing table with a large mirror and two overstuffed armchairs with a coffee table planted in between them by the windows. After Sarek left, she let herself fall flat out on her back on the double bed covered by a duvet. There were four fluffy pillows and the mattress was soft, quite unlike the pallets she and her year-mates had to contend with during their stay on Vulcan.

 

Several minutes later, a restless Amanda was up and about. After a cursory examination of her reflection in the mirror, she checked the chest of drawers. Sarek had told her there were extra garments in the first drawer. Amanda's face fell when she found two somber suits of slightly differing shades, identical to the garments practically all the Vulcans at the embassy wore. The only quasi-exception Amanda was aware of was Sarek whose somber suit had sigils on the front and sleeves.

 

While seriously considering calling Eleanor in the morning to beg Misha to deliver one of Amanda's formal suits to the embassy, Amanda drew out a long thick rather woolly robe that was a Vulcan nightgown.

 

I'm going to roast in this, Amanda thought with a sigh as she threw the nightgown over her shoulder and went into the ensuite bathroom, which thankfully had a water shower.

 

~o~ ~o~ ~o~

 

"Now I know why Vulcans are so stiff."

 

"Very funny," Theodore said to a not-at-all-amused Amanda, who felt as though she hadn't slept a wink.

"I slept on the floor," said Eleanor.

 

"That's a good idea!" Stephan exclaimed. "I should do that too. It should be a lot less painful. My bed was so narrow, I must had fallen out of it half a dozen times last night."

 

"Eight times. I heard you. You'll have to learn to sleep without tossing about so much," Misha told his brother.

 

''I'm thinking it's an endurance test, but it feels off. They're always telling us to get enough sleep. These beds are making it difficult for us to get enough sleep."

"Good point, Farah," said Misha.

Eleanor, ever the optimistic, said, "We should be used to sleeping on them sooner or later."

"Maybe it's a problem-solving test," Theodore suddenly said, drawing all eyes to him.

"A problem-solving test?" echoed Farah.

"Sure. I had a problem with sleeping on a stone slab so I made myself a hammock," said Theodore, grinning when his friends' faces turned flabbergasted. He was immediately contracted to make five more hammocks plus four more when their guardians found out.

 

~o~ ~o~ ~o~

 

Sarek returned with a meal tray. He knocked on the door; there was no answer. Catching the faint sound of water running, he assumed that Amanda was in the bathroom. After considering his options and logically coming to the conclusion that there were two courses of action for him to follow, he checked the doorknob. Finding it unlocked, he opened the door, walked in, placed the meal tray on one of the end tables by the bed, walked out of the room and closed the door, all of which was quietly accomplished in 3.7 seconds.

 

When Amanda came out of the bathroom and saw the meal tray, she glanced at the door. After a while, a smile slowly came over her face.

 

Finis.


End file.
